It has been 1 year since we found out that i am diabetic. My parents were very scared initially, so was I. They are still very worried. They...
I am 18 years old now. I am in second year of my graduation. My parents have been looking for a groom for me. I have told them that I want to study further. They have said that it's okay for me to study even after marriage. I practice yoga a lot. At least two hours per day early in the morning. Doctor has consulted me to do yoga for my health issues.
We all were having our dinner. No one of us was talking. "Didi has recommended a boy for our Arti." My mother initiated this conversation. I stopped eating. "But papa my studies?" I immediately said. He looked at me and smiled."Beta, Don't worry. Your studies won't be effected by all of this. We shall make sure of that." He said. I relaxed.
Frankly speaking, I am least concerned with marriage arrangements. All I am thinking about my studies. I knew that I will have to marry the person my parents will choose. So I am not thinking about that at all. I just don't want my studies to stop.
"When can we fix meeting?" I came out of my thought as my mother spoke. "Call them day after tomorrow." Papa said. "And Arti, you won't go college day after tomorrow. Take off. Okay?" He said looking at me. I nodded positively. "By the way, today's curry is fantastic" my father said taking morsel in his mouth. He chewed closing his eyes as if he is taking full taste of the food. Mummy and I smiled. "Arti has made today's curry." Mummy informed papa. My father's eyes widened and he gave a very wide smile. "Very nice" he said continuing eating. I felt very good. "It is very good for girls to take interest in kitchen business. They get lot of respect in their in laws home." My smile vanished as soon as I heard those words.
Do i really need to be good in kitchen to gain respect?
"I am full" i said leaving the dinning table. I got into my room. I was restless but couldn't understand the reason. Papa has said that he will make sure that I continue to study. Then why the hell i am so anxious. I couldn't pay attention to my studies that night and i preferred dozzing off.
Everyone was smiling, laughing and talking among themselves. "Mr. Sharma, we really like your daughter." Uncle said. "Yes, me too." Aunty said in agreement. I smiled and looked down. "If Sameer would have come, then we would have got to know his choice as well" papa said trying to know about the reason. "Actually, he is into his new job. It was a very urgent meeting otherwise he would have definitely come but don't worry, our choice is his choice." Uncle said. "Mr. Sharma, we really like your daughter and don't worry about her studies. We shall let her continue her studies." Uncle continued. I felt happy when he mentioned about studies. That's the only portion of this meeting made me happy.
Something came in mind. I wasn't sure if I should say this or not but it is important to be discussed. "Uncle,aunty. I want to ask something" my parents looked at me with disbelief. My mother showed me wide eyes and angry face. "No ,no Mrs. Sharma. Let her speak. There's no need to hide anything." Aunty said. Mummy couldn't stop me any further. "Aunty, have my parents told you that I am diabetic?" Silence stretched in the room upon my words. Their face were telling very clearly that they didn't know anything about it.
I am so dead now.
My parents will kill me after their departure to bring up this topic.
God! Please save me.
"What was the need of bringing up that topic?" Mummy yelled at me very badly. "Mummy, you should have told them before their arrival." I said in a calm manner. She was so angry that she wasn't even listening to me. I looked at papa. He was not saying anything but i could sense that he is in tension. I walked towards him and sat beside him. "Papa, it is morally wrong to hide anything from them. Do you also think that i did something wrong?" I asked papa. "Do hell with your morals and do hell with your right and wrong" mummy screamed again before papa could say something. Papa hinted him to stay quite. But she was still fuming in anger."Beta, go to your room. We shall see what to do." He said not looking at me. A tear escaped from my eyes. I took small steps and went to my room. I changed into my home casuals.
Have I done something wrong?
But how can we establish a marriage with lies?
Isn't honesty and truthfulness is important for relationships ?
After 2 days I was busy in my studies my mother came in my room with a very happy face. She hugged me me from behind and it turned me to face her. I was not expecting this because she was very angry with me." I am so happy, I am so so so happy." she said with a very wide smile I couldn't understand anything. I couldn't help and ask her what happened "mummy, why r u so happy?" " Do you know they had called" she said "who called?" I asked in confusion "oh ho Sameer parents called and they have no problem with you being diabetic and they are very much ready" she said I was also surprised. Are there really this much good to accept me even after knowing everything. "Really?" i asked mummy in disbelief."Yes and they have said that they want this marriage to be done as soon as possible" with this tension came across my mind. "Mummy, can't they wait for my graduation to get complete?" I asked my mother "Beta they want this to get finished as soon as possible and if they want it then we must agree because they have a agreed even after knowing about your diabetic condition so it is not wise to delay it any further and your papa also wants this" I couldn't argue anymore she left from there saying that she has many things to arrange now.
I was in my college and suddenly a message came on my mobile phone. The message was from the bank and it was written that 10 lakh rupees has been deducted from your account. I was shocked because my parents had enough money to prepare for my marriage. They did not need any more money. I couldn't understand this and somewhere I was scared whether parents have asked for dowry? And if it is so then this is a very big issue to sort out I reached home as soon as possible
"Papa, what is the need of 10 lakh rupees?" I asked my father in a very stern manner. "You don't need to know about it" he replied not even looking at me papa."I need to know what is the issue" i said."The issue is you" my mother said from behind I turned to face her. I looked at her with confusion "Yes, it is you. If you didn't bring up that diabetic matter then they would have never asked for dowry to make you their daughter in law."
I was shocked to listen this I couldn't believe that my parents had to give dowry for my marriage.
"Papa you are not going to do this. This marriage is getting off" I said. I had tears in my eyes."No, this can't happen.You wanted to tell them about your condition, about your medical condition and we agreed that now you have to agree with what we are asking you to do and if we have said that this is the only way to get you married then this is how it is and you have to accept it."he said dismissing the matter." but papa......" I couldn't even complete my sentence."what do you want?you did what you wanted to do and now we are doing what is right to do what do you think who will come to marry a diabetic girl. we just want your future to be safe and secured and this marriage proposal is best for you and we are doing what is best for you" she said yelling at me."but mummy this is wrong. Dowry is wrong." I said in a weeping. "Then how do you think the marriages are going on around you and specially when your medical condition is unstable. what do you expect that someone will accept a tact bride without any favours. you know what! people say right. girls should stay at home because they think that they can achieve anything they can overpower anything once the get educated. They start arguing and questioning their parents the decisions." she said. She grabbed my arm and made me look at her "look Arti! you have messed up things already. I don't want you to interfere in this. You just enjoy this wedding and your married life. That's it." I started weeping loudly my father came close to me and put his hand on my head. "You will thank us one day
What ever we are doing, are doing for your goodwill" he said smiling and hugged me.
I should be happy but I am not.
I should be excited but I am not.
I should be impatient for my wedding but I am not.
why?
somewhere I knew that whatever is happening around me is not good but yet I had to agree because my parents have said this so and I am quite young to oppose them. I have seen Sameer's photo but I have not met him personally. I wanted to but my mother said that they have met him and he is a great guy and if she has said this then I have no doubt but still I am not happy.
I am more like anxious.
I am hell nervous.
I don't know what is going to happen now
I wanted to talk to Sameer about this dowry matter but my parents strictly told me to not to discuss this matter with anyone as they really wanted this marriage to happen.
Is my marriage is so important to them ?
why don't they talk about my studies anymore?
why do they always tell me that if you will do this in your in-laws home then they will be happy?
I make food because I like to make it. I don't make food to make someone happy. Yes I feel happy when anyone praises it but still it shouldn't be an obligation.
All the rituals got completed and I came to my in laws home for the very first time. I was sitting on the bed of my husband's room. I didn't know what to think about,what to feel about as I have not thought about it a lot because all the time I had been thinking about the dowry.
"beta what ever happened has just happened. forget about everything. just focus on your marriage and remember that it's a girl's responsibility to make a marriage successful. Be good with everyone there and don't make anyone unhappy or angry" my mother's words echoed in my ears.
Tonight is my wedding night. I have read in the novels that girls start feeling butterflies in their stomach when their first night come.
But why am I not feeling anything like this.
where are the butterflies?
where is the sweet nervousness ?
that I had read in the novels.
were they fictional?
Because if not then why isn't it happening with me.
I was lost in the world of my thoughts suddenly I noticed that the door opened and there was Sameer standing locking up the door.
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This chapter is dedicated to springoceania and missme2294 ❤️🤗. Thank you so much for your lovely comments.
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